Mandatory Therapy

Finally I heard back from the therapist who is supposed to meet with us to discuss the emotional implications of using a DE.

To recap, I emailed her last Tuesday (Jan 31). When I did not hear back I called and left a voicemail on Friday (Feb 3). And again on Tuesday (Feb 7). I even emailed the coordinator at the clinic and asked why she wasn’t responding.

Apparently she has been away for the past week and only just got back (on Tuesday according to the coordinator). And my email landed in her junk mail. Regardless, I am not sure why it took her two days after she got back to respond to my voice mails. But anyways. She apologized, and since this is mandatory, it is not like I have much choice.

She explained the process. DH and I will need to come in to discuss the emotional impact of using a DE. It will be a 2 hour session and there will be a $250 charge. She books up pretty quickly (she only works Mon Wed Thu) but since we are not starting till April we have a bit of time.

On kink though, DH leaves for New York next weekend and is not back till mid-April. And we are planning to get started on the IVF cycle the minute he gets back. Since I am on HRT, I can pretty much predict my day 1 in April will be a few days after he gets back. That way if the first cycle produces an insufficient lining we can just keep going without loosing too much time.

I told her we have already selected our donor. And her reaction implied to me that there really wasn’t much to talk about now that we have already selected a donor. (I guess most people have issues finding the ‘perfect’ match?) So if we were to schedule a meeting in April,  there would be a lot less to discuss. So it all sounded like this was a session that would be almost pointless by the time we are able to see her.

I don’t mind doing it. I mean it can only help make sure that I am being sane and rational about this whole process. I feel it will be very helpful for DH. I have been dealing with the reality of IF and loss of my own eggs for over 20 years now. I read up on it, participate in the forums online. I have this as outlet to discuss what I am going through. DH has really only had since he has met me, and even then we weren’t actively looking into IVF until last year. He is a med student, so gets the process well enough. But psychologically he might have a bit more to discuss and process than I do. And as a couple it can only help make sure we are both on the same page.

Turns out, the therapist had a cancellation for Monday at noon. So we got that appointment. So that’s it then. DH and I are all set to meet the therapist on Monday.

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One thought on “Mandatory Therapy

  1. Awesome. She will probably ask questions to see your plans for disclosing this information to your child. That’s what’s ours focused on (with a very strong emphasis on the importance of disclosure) after she determined we weren’t crazy or alcoholics

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